It is Time: Whom Should I Choose?

“If you could, for an hour, sit on this bench and talk to anyone, who would it be?”

This question can – and should – be answered according to your feelings at this time. And to help you select this ideal person, I ask you now:

. What is your biggest problem today?
. Who could help you solve it?
. Have you ever looked back at your childhood and reflected on your life-functioning pattern?
. How are your relationships (work, love, social, family)?

I usually say that, often, this ideal person to talk to you, in a sincere and decisive way, ends up being yourself. Let me explain it better…

Observing your thoughts, words, actions and posture (including mental and emotional) may have gone unnoticed by you, mostly thanks to the rush of everyday life as most of the time we live on such autopilot mode; however, it is these thoughts, acts and patterns of behavior – which happen repeatedly in your reality – that create your future, your tomorrow. And so, if something doesn’t go well today, there’s nothing better than taking a deep breath, evaluating, pondering and making necessary adjustments, in the here and now, for a better tomorrow.

Easy? Nop – far be it from me to say that a job of self-knowledge and behavioral adjustment can be easy. But I say – and I repeat – sure absolutely necessary!

My invitation here: that you, my dear reader, decide to take a step towards your biggest movement in recent times, starting your process of self-knowledge, self-healing, personal and professional self-development. Yes – because everything is so connected, and I strongly believe that professional success does not exist in isolation. Do you agree with me?

Giving the famous “start” means moving without judgment (or with as little judgment as possible, as I usually emphasize, within the teachings of mindfulness in coaching – mindfulness, according to the basis brought by Jon Kabat-Zinn). If you still don’t know this coaching support tool, let me introduce you to this video below, spoken in Portuguese, and with captions in English:

Mindfulness as a support tool in coaching helps you to be present in the moment, in the here and now, to focus on one activity at a time, and to work on your mental and emotional power, focusing on self-discovery, self-improvement, leaving self-criticism aside. Of course, like any tool, repetitive practice becomes essential for the results to be appreciated at a high level, but this initial movement can help you give your preliminary impulse towards a fuller life, in every way.

If these lines above made any sense to you, maybe you’ve decided to sit on the bench with yourself, and start that internal chat – yes!?

Now, I want to remind you that, as the inspiring and renowned Louise Hay said:

“The “problem” is rarely the real problem.”

And this brings so much clarity to these lines and to your conversation with yourself, because I honestly don’t know a better support tool for this phase of “chatting with you” than the Mirror Work Validation, as Louise herself left us as her legacy. The “Mirror Work” exercise has come to help thousands and thousands of people around the world, and now I need you to do your part to reach the next step in your own development and progress – can I count on you?

It works like this: Choose a small mirror and focus your gaze on your own eyes, on your image in the mirror, saying it out loud, “I love you and accept you exactly as you are.” Seeing yourself in the mirror, working on self-acceptance and self-love, opens a “flowery” path in front of you. But you need to do this exercise repeatedly, at least a few times a day, for several days. Let’s go? And do you know what? You have incredible healing powers and incredible room for growth, but you must decide to take action.

So, consider these lines as a preliminary coaching session with me, and from now on, I invite you to make small and consistent moves towards your growing and full success, in the various areas of your life. And as there are two basic rules (start and persist) that create our habits, and that help us to achieve lasting success, I leave here my sincere wish that you, after having taken this initial step and reached the end of this reading, keep going, and keep progressing! So, if it makes sense to you, I want to invite you to join my students in the self-coaching results course, a fully online self-training backed by the Udemy platform; because I know that your reality from now on can move towards another level, a level of focus, persistence and action in favor of a “better me”, of a better future! Shall we?

Authored by Fernanda Cristina Alem Freitas, founder of Brain U Coaching. This article was originally published on the LinkedIn platform, in Portuguese. This is a free translation of the original one.